Truth be told...

There are such secrets happening in my head at the moment that I'd don't know where to begin...
I want so badly to be able to write them down - to free them from my head...to have something happen and be free of the craziness and paranoia and fear and general disappointment with everything.

But I can't.

I can't say these things out loud or make them real by giving them volume or tell the truth.

Need to go back somewhere.
Need to rewind and find myself in that place that makes me feel like me...

But in the same breathe...I don't.

Need to feel like me... But it will come...

As always - the strange and pathetic reality will be revealed...
As always it will make me feel like me...
And as always...I'll spend my days wishing I wasn't.